TJP-
first off-
I am here to learn, and to stay sane, and to get strong enough to do the things that may help my son, and not hurt him. I am not here to stop him from drinking when he gets money, or to change him. I know that I cant do that. but I do want to learn not to enable, for he needs a chance at life, and I don't want to ruin his chances.
I realize that people may be getting frustrated, cause we all want to help and when some one does not seem to listen, it looks like they really dont want to change, that they are just crying "poor me", and maybe they are comfortable in the victim role. I hate those posts.
I am here to learn, and I spend much of my thoughts each day trying to see him in a different light. It helps to see him as "some guy" who lives here, but that mindset is hard to maintain, when youhave such codie tendencies.
I just dont want to blow it . I am thinking of insisting that he go into the mental health center here in town, to talk to someone about what is going on in his life. I really think he would go, even tho he would deny that. There are times when i have set something up, and he went along. He is not totally ignorant of his part in this, i dont think.
I still want him to get on his own, but it may be a little time. i need help with boundaries.
i almost chickened out of the meeting last night, and then he started talking about his nerves, and acting all grumpy, so i shot out the door, and found my way there, it was pretty far away. i will need tofind one closer.