Hi Look,
to SR! You will find a lot of support and help on this forum, so please keep posting and know that we all understand what you are going through. I relate to your post, although the alcoholic in my life is my sister. But I have an anxiety disorder, and my sister also has that same disorder in addition dealing with her alcoholism. For me, I have found that medication combined with therapy has helped my anxiety tremendously. I tried meds alone, which helped the symptoms but didn't help me understand why I was feeling anxious. The therapy helped me to understand the reasons for my anxiety, so I would say that in my experience, I need both.
Originally Posted by
looking4help1 
She is anxious every waking moment. We have two wonderful children but as time goes by she is less and less capable to be part of the family.
I don't want to sound harsh, but alcoholism is a progressive disease and this is very common--spending less and less time with the family and more and more time with the bottle. In my experience with my sister, she chooses alcohol over her family every time. I am actually no longer in contact with her, and she is isolated from most of the rest of the family because either she has chosen to isolate herself or people have set up boundaries with her drinking (as I have).
Originally Posted by
looking4help1 She has prescribed meds but these are proving ineffective and alcohol seems to be the only thing that gives her relief.
Alcohol, in most cases, cancels out the efficacy of medications prescribed for anxiety or other mental illnesses. This is the case with my sister.
Originally Posted by
looking4help1 She has tried rehab several times now, and this time has managed less than a week.....we are back to square one again and she is very depressed.
Alcohol is also a depressant and will worsen the feelings of depression or anxiety.
Originally Posted by
looking4help1 The docs all say she needs to stop drinking first and then they can work on the OCD and anxiety but she cant cope long enough to move to the second stage.
It is good she is trying...but unfortunately she has to be the one to decide to quit once and for all. My sister is in the same situation; she will not quit drinking to treat the anxiety.
How are you coping? How are your children coping? Do you have an Al-Anon program you can go to? Keep posting and know we're here to listen to you and help you.