If you kick him out, MAYBE things will get more unpleasant for him for awhile, but he at least has some motivation to change his life, which is something he doesn't have now. It may be his only shot at getting help for himself.
Lexie,
this makes me so very scared. Why does this have to be on me? the person who loves him more than anyone in the world? I picture it- shutting the door, after some big men "encourage " him to go (he wont listen to me tell him to go), and then watching him walk with his pack on his back, without a dollar for a coffee, or an idea of where to sleep. I know i would fall to the floor, and cry my heart dry. I would be sick with worry.
all my life, i wanted someone to help us as kids, and as long as i have breath, i want to help others, especially my own son.to give them the warmth of a bed, to let them have food, and a room to be in for the night.
and all he is doing with all that love is stepping on it. just not choosing to do things that would possibly help. he is in denial that anything can help him get on his feet, and i feel that he wants so badly to believe that he has no problem with alcohol, no tendency to abuse pills (for nerves- if he could get them), feels all his problems will be solved with a decent job, etc.
last night , he chilled me to the bone, for he said in a low voice "just cause i get that job, doesn't mean everything is gonna be fixed". I think he was trying to tell me that he is still gonna need something for his nerves.
he is so sick or selfish. both i think.
i am not going to keep him here. i will somehow, find the strength and courage to get him out. this is helping.
gonna get to that meeting tonight.