Relationships with or without the drinking are never easy. I am not denying the challenges of loving someone who drinks but there is a HUGE difference in loving someone who is actively drinking and not willing to do anything about it than someone who is struggling, stumbling and aware they have a big problem to work on.
I am not trying to defend anyone who drinks and causes havoc in others lives. But for every dysfuntional relationship with an alcoholic, there is one with someone who isn't. My dad was very angry and abusive. Barely touched a drop. My ex husband was cold and uncaring (but a great dad), not a drinker either. Dysfunction comes in many forms.