Originally Posted by
HurtingAgain 
I don't want a divorce. I want my husband back, the way he used to be, and it's terrifying not knowing if that will ever happen.
It will never happen.
That's not to say that things will never be good again, or that your marriage cannot be saved. It's just reality that life never goes backward, only forward. If he stays sober, and if you stay together, it will not be the same. You will both have grown, changed, and moved forward. Clinging to "the way things used to be" is a certain recipe for suffering.
I think Alanon will really help.
And, I wish you the best.
L