I am sorry that you are in such a painful place right now. I am glad that you came to SR.
My ex ABF went to counseling and AA so I wouldn't leave him. It means absolutely nothing if they don't do it for themselves. While in counseling and going to 2 meetings a day, he sneaked and lied and kept right on drinking, but behind my back always. He denied it, he blamed me for not trusting him. I almost went insane; had a panic attack right on the highway with my daughter in the car. Finally, I had no choice but to leave. I love him still, but that doesn't mean that he's right for me, at least not right now.
Take care of you. You have absolutely no control, no influence at all when it comes to an active alcoholic. None whatsoever.
So glad to hear that you are going to Al Anon. The only thing we can control is ourselves. Don't forget that.