Thanks for the responses. I appreciate that none of us can really tell how things will turn out. It's just a funny position to be in. In July I had a stern talk with myself: "I'll only stay if he sobers up and stops this nonsense!" and now that he's sober I'm all, "Huh! Nevermind! Maybe I want to leave anyway!"
I have an appointment for a counsellor in two week's time (I have to go through my GP first) so I'm waiting on that. I appreciate the advice to trust my gut, but at the same time my gut is telling me to talk things over with someone and get support in place before I take a step. Except, certainly, if he does relapse, I'm out of here.
It's just a relief to be able to come here. At home I'm scrupulously calm and detached-seeming about the drinking, so it's nice to come here and say how sick I am of this crap.