Thanks for the post, Bolina. I've had to read it, leave, come back to re-read, etc. My initial reaction was just that: a reaction without taking in the entire blog and post. The reaction was 'you mean I was the reason I was abused?!' It's taken several reads to realize the blog really points out that my not enforcing my boundaries initially was probably a signal to STBXAH (even if on a completely subconscious level for both of us) that I would enable his alcoholism and put up with the abusive behavior. Blehhh.
I don't think I was raised to be quiet, subservient or to allow my needs to be overlooked. My mom and sisters certainly speak their minds and stand up for themselves.
I find it interesting that I've been able to read the other threads about boundaries without internalizing the messages or examining the issue.