HurtingAgain, definitely don't abandon us here! I have found that infidelity and alcoholism go hand in hand. Sometimes they think they can get someone who "understands" why they drink, or someone who will feed them their narcisisstic supply, or someone who will silently and lovingly walk with them on their path to killing themselves, like Elizabeth Shue did for Nicholas Cage in leaving Las Vegas.
I am also so very sorry for the pain you are going through. BTDT, so I know that that information is like a kick in the stomach, after all the other cr*p we put up with.
We are here for you as you reclaim your life--