Thanks everyone! I agree. I had been trying to get him to go FOREVER but he never would. Then last week when I saw my therapist he suggested it because I can't even have a conversation with him a this point. He thought it would be beneficial just so I could tell him how I feel in a safe space and then feel like I could move on. I really could care less if we go at this point, I know it's not going to make a difference about how I feel, at the very least I'll be able able to get some screaming out.
I left it up to AH to make the appointment and that clearly hasn't happened. So at this point I'm going back to NC until I'm ready for it to just be over with.