Here's one I wrote:
Dear Son,
I hope that over the years I have shown you how much you mean to me – that I love you with my whole heart and I only want what is best for you. I love you as only a mother can. I pray that you will keep that thought as you read on and as you move on in your life.
There comes a time when a parent must release their child to the world and cease to be the caregiver. It’s difficult to know when that time is right and is the decision that every parent struggles with at some point. I, too, have struggled but I know that now is the time to give you the dignity and the wings to build your own life in your own way.
The last 2 years have been exhausting for all of us, and most of all for you, I’m sure. I only want you to be happy but feel like the support your dad and I have given you is not what you need, obviously. You have different plans for your life but I think you feel stuck trying to please us instead of yourself. So go…. Do it your own way and I’ll keep you in my positive thoughts and I will always love you…no matter what.
I do hope that you find a way to rid yourself of drugs once and for all. I’m grateful for the time you spent at [rehab name], the sober house, and in all those meetings in [town]. You have the tools and you know what you need to do when you are ready. Remember that you can always call the counselors at [rehab] for support and guidance.
I’m sorry that I have to limit our contact and phone calls because staying involved in your life causes a great deal of stress and anxiety for me, for [husband and daughter]. I know you don’t understand that side of the story, but maybe you will some day. We all have a right to a peaceful existence and for my own health and serenity, that is what I have to do. I won’t provide you with money, gas or a place to stay. I can only offer my love and prayers.
I will always love you. No matter what.
Mom