Heartache and Uncertainty
Hi,
My son was a heroin and meth addict for 15 years. He started using drugs when he was 15. It started with weed and just continued to heavier drugs. Three years ago he asked for help and after many sleepless nights and stressful days he was taken from the emergency room to a Detox center. On his second to last day there he got kicked out. He disappeared and ended up living with a girl addicted to perscription drugs. After several months he came to live with me, went back to school and was doing great (we thought). When he broke my rules I kicked him out and he found a room to rent and one night the police arrived and he and two other roomies were arrested. My son was charged with possession of drug paraphanelia. On his court date he was given a lesser charge, 4 years probation, community service, and a fine.
He eventually got kicked out of school for failing a drug test. Then things just went sour. He hooked up with the wrong people and was once again arrested for probation violation and went to jail for 30 days. He has been clean since his release but because of some low life girlfriend he lost the job he had, was kicked out of where they were living and ended up in a homeless shelter.
Once again he turned to his family for help, and once again we were there for him. He has two bad heart valves due to his past drug use. He has been living with me for the past month and last week he went into a very strict 28 day, 12 step, in-house, rehab center.
After 24 years of marriage his dad and I divorced. We have two other children all grown. My son's drug use affected our entire family unit. I was a stay at home Mom and our children had a wonderful life (so I thought). Now it seems all they remember is their brother's drug use and the hell he put us through. It breaks my heart that my other two children only have bad memories of growing up.
I am hopeful about the rehab program my son is in but I am also scared. I don't know what I should do when he is released and how much of an enabler I should be. My son has lost everything.....he has no job, no car, no place to live, and no future.
Thanks to all who read this and thanks for listening to my story of heartache and uncertainty.
Kelli