Hi Gardner
This is a good idea. I guess Im one who sees things a little differently now. I did write my sister a letter when she was alive but thinking about it now, the letter I would of given her was the one I wrote for her funeral. Two different types of letters. The letter I wrote to her when she was alive - was basically one about what I wanted for her and how I saw her then. The letter I would give her now is about the person she really was. WARNING - ITS LONG....
Julie was born on the 24.05.1968 at Lefevre Hospital, Semaphore at a very healthy 10lb weight. Blonde hair and a cheeky smile.
She grew up in Parr St Largs Bay all of her childhood. She was mummy & daddys girl and would cling to mums legs wherever she went. Dad was home with Parkinsons Disease while mum was off working, so she spent a lot of time with dad and watched planet of the apes and many western films with him. She was completely devastated at dads passing. As a baby I called her ‘bubby’ and remember dad putting on the bedlamp for her every night until she went to sleep because she was afraid of the dark.
She moved to Alberton with mum at the age of 14yrs. She left school at an early age because she hated school and couldn’t wait to leave. At 14 she met her future husband – Ton and commenced working there at their family restaurant at Marion.
From a very young age, especially as a teenager she loved fashion, makeup, magazines showing clothes and hair. Julie had a great sense of fashion and always looked lovely. I was eighteen and Julie was 10. I would often find makeup & clothes missing and guess who had it. I would tickle her until I found it inside her bed. She would often watch me putting on makeup and ask me ‘ whats that for’ – ‘can I try it?’ I remember spending ages trying to get tangled curlers out of her long blonde hair while she screwed up her face and complained. This was the beginning of a fashion guru.
Julie said ambition never really worried her at all because as a teenager she loved working in the restaurant and getting to know all the regular customers. Julie mainly enjoyed chatting with all the seniors and having a laugh.
She did this for nearly 20years with her ex husband. Her main ambition was to work alongside her husband, save up and support her children. All her working life was spent in hospitality working alongside her ex husband. She was in charge of staff part-time, greeted customers , worked in the bar & served customers in takeaway. She liked the part time hours as this gave her the independence and choice to be with her children when they needed her.
They bought their first house at Marion and this is where their first child Amy came home to from the hospital. They then built a beautiful home at Happy Valley and this is when Andrew was born.
As they became more successful in their achievements they moved to Glenelg East and this is where Julie & her family had her ‘dream’ home. (that is what she use to say to me). Julie loved antique furniture and filled her home with gorgeous pieces and spent her time decorating it. She also liked spending time looking at real estate with the hope of one day growing a portfolio.
She loved music which she oftened played and ‘Hulio Eglasisius’ was often singing in the background of a telephone conversation. Her pets were especially loved by her and were part of her the family.
She particularly loved jewellery and perfume.
The most important point to make, is that Julie was devoted & protective to her children. She absolutely adored and loved them and they were her 1st priority in her life. Julie loved being a mother and saw it as her main job in life. She wanted to encourage them in their future goals and was always there for them. They made her so happy because they cared for her and would look out for her. She was proud that they would tell her they loved her. Andrew as a child would often tell her how beautiful she was and called her Fifi, this made her feel so good inside. She spent many hours trying to beat him on the Super Nintendo and taking her children to Tai Chondo. Julie and Amy spent a lot of time shopping because Julie loved shopping. Julie has passed this skill onto her daughter Amy. She would tell Amy she didn’t need makeup because she was already so beautiful. Amy remembers mum giving her a lot of advice on boys, her future and looking after herself. Driving the kids to school everyday they would sing along to ABBA songs.
Julie wasn’t the best cook but she really gave it her best shot. When first married she tried cooking ton’s favourite meal ‘fried rice’. It was very dry and lumpy and because he couldn’t tell her how bad it was, he ate it anyway. As a family we would spend many occasions together celebrating birthdays, bbqs and christmas’s, mainly at Joannes place. Julies children are very close to their cousins and are more like brother and sister. Much laughter, and competition around the pool table or playing games together. Julie would more than likely be always late because she spent a lot of time getting ready.
Julie believed values were important in life, like, respect, honesty and especially time for her children and family. She had the greatest sense of humor and she would ask me when I was going to get my hair done! Its been 40 years Joanne. Often we would have huge laughs at comments she would make – often at others expense. One funny moment Andrew particularly remembers when he asked nanny – what does ‘ Julie’s ’ name mean and the reply was – ‘afraid of doing housework’. This was one area she really didn’t have a liking to and mum was always picking up after her.
In recent years Julie wanted financial independence and security by the time she was 50years of age. She thought about going back to TAFE and finding work in ‘Aged Care’ because of her experience with seniors in hospitality. She wanted to save up and eventually travel to Europe one day to see Rome, it was a dream of hers.
Julie struggled the last few years with the major changes in her life and found it difficult to move forward but I will remember this beautiful sister of mine as a gorgeous, soft and gentle woman who protected everyone she dearly loved. A generous & kind woman who was too afraid to ask for help. We will always be together, loving each other and caring about the other, whether it is in heaven or on earth. The main words I will hear is ‘I love you, bye. ‘
This letter I think may have made the difference, I will never know!