It will calm down in time. My first husband has been sober in AA for 30 years. He did what he had to do in the beginning, and it was a LOT. Don't discourage his involvement in AA or be resentful about it. Drinking took far more from you than AA ever will.
I had to laugh when you wrote about his being "groomed for leadership." There ARE no "leaders" in AA. All service positions are rotated. As people get solid sobriety they do have additional responsibilities in terms of working with others.
I have been around AA since my first husband got sober, have been in Al-Anon when I needed it, and am now two years sober, myself, in AA.
I hope you can find it in your heart to do a little socializing with some of the people in AA and their partners. Why not go to some of the softball games, and other social activities? It isn't required, but it might be good for your relationship and make you feel a little more comfortable about the time he needs to spend in AA activities right now.