Same here Kev, I stopped going out for a while because I was too anxious that he would be online flirting because I wasn't there. It's sooo horrible to live like that, the anxiety is paralysing.
I remember though, coming on here and telling everyone what he'd done, there would be an outcry and immediately my back would go up and I would have a HUGE desire to defend him. Some of the responses kinda drove me back to him in a way because I was in that "blind" stage where "mine is different" and "you don't know him like I do".
I'd go away thinking you lot didn't know what you were talking about, lol. Only in the beginning mind...then as he let me down time and time again, I began to see that the answers here were all true but I just had to learn that for myself.