We all have to do things step by step according to what we can do at the time.
Inpatient would give you a break.
I watched a BBC documentary last night called "Rain in my Heart". It's on youtube now and it chronicles 4 alcoholic people. Their drs, their home lives, everything
There is a link to it over in Newcomers In Recovery.
It really opened my eyes.
just in case you or anyone who reads this might be interested.