I thought you might be my wife under an assumed name until I saw your number of posts. She accused me of the exact same thing: trying to control her. I've had to give that considerable thought, because it is a valid concern. Codependency isn't the issue here, though. Codies either try to fix problems in others rather than in themselves or they allow another to do all the fixing for them. I'm not avoiding my problems.
If she weren't my wife, then it wouldn't be an issue. I'd simply walk away and wish her the best. I suppose I am trying to control one thing: the stability and safety of my home. It's a fine line to walk, I know, and it is a responsibility I do not take lightly. I don't think I used religion to back that up. The basis of my assertion is not that her drinking bothers me because I am a Christian, but because I am an alcoholic.