Hi PJSparks
Stick to your guns! If you tell him you're through, then mean what you say! Of course he will threaten and do everything he can to find the right buttons to push, so that you will stay with him!
My son pulls that garbage all the time. Not with me anymore, but with the gf. I tell her when he does that threatening to kill himself, or whatever, don't beg him not to do this or that, just quietly say, "do what you have to do!"
I have said that to him many times, and he gets really angry with me. In the back of my mind I always think, what if he does?? Well, I now know that whatever he does is not my doing just as all his bad behavior is not my doing! I didn't teach him to be a thief or a liar!! He has done all this on his own.
Moral of the story is, they do everything in their power to keep you/me on our toes and scared! It's time to let him know you are more scared to stick around with someone who is out of control!
Hugs & Prayers heading your way
Devastated