It is just NEVER ends....
Being seperate from AH has it's benefits like seeing the how distorted and twisted his world is. I asked a simple question today - and well he lied...and I knew it...and that drives me insane. WHY? Because I believe he thinks I am stupid enough to believe him. And of course why would I believe he thinks I am stupid - because he has called me that so many times - along w/ the thosands of other insults. The more I think I "understand" how sick he is, the more I realize that I can't possible comprehend the degree to which he is ill. And for him this is NOT just when he is drinking - it is all the time! I thought it would be easy to untangle myself from this "hold" he has on me - but his maniuplation and words are more painful than I could ever imagine - it hurts so bad still...even though I feel there is nothing left. I need this to be over....and yet we have 2 kids together, so will it ever really be over...sorry just venting. I know the no contact think would be best....but our bills and life w/ kids is so intertwined, I find this to be nearly impossible......but it may come to that!