Oh, duet! I cried when I read your story. Thank you so much for sharing it. I really, really needed to hear what you said.
I am an alcoholic. Sober for 18 months now by the Grace of God. My only daughter, age 24, is having major problems. She doesn't see it that way. She knows what I was like as a drunk and encouraged me in my sobriety up until I got a year. Then she started bringing liquor in to the home again. Smoking weed while I was out (but of course I could smell it when I got home). Staying out 'til 3 a.m. and sleeping until 1 or 2 the next day. She lost one job, was unemployed (with a million excuses) for 8 plus months finally got another job and promptly quit after five whole days!
I can't even say it all right now. It's all so sad. I have been praying for God to tell me how to handle this situation. I really think she was leaving the bottle out for me to see in hopes that maybe I would slip? I don't know.
I have been so worried that instead of providing for her maybe I've been enabling. There is no maybe to it. I have been enabling. Enabling out of guilt from my past mistakes. I told her a week ago she needed to go live with her Dad and go back to school. He said he would pay for college for her but he would not "tolerate the same S____ that your mother put up with". She refused to go live with him and is now sleeping on a couch of a friend's.
I'm so worried about her and she has been so cruel lately. Her words cut me open. She tells me she was there for me and now I won't support her when she needs me. I have done this for 24 years! In the last 3 years, she has gotten a DUI, DUS, lost one job because of drugs (failed drug test she KNEW was coming) and then quit another job after five days. I don't know if she truly has an addiction or if she could stop everything today or not. All I know for sure is, I was truly trying to help but it was only hindering.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your post. I do know one thing absolutely, without question: My sobriety MUST come first. Period. If I don't stay sober I won't be any good to any body!
Love and appreciation to you all at SR and God Bless You!
Last edited by SCRedhead; 09-02-2010 at 02:54 AM.
Reason: missed a word