Originally Posted by
BklynGrl 
This is one of my AH's favorite phrases whether we are fighting or trying to have a serious conversation. He always pulls it out, "just tell me what to do and I'll do it." Which is then usually followed by I don't know how to make you happy anymore.
Is he using this phrase after you tell him all the things he is doing wrong in life and in the relationship?
It happened in my marriage. I was telling him all the things he was doing wrong. The things he was doing were making me feel unloved, disrepected. He was frustrated and said "Tell me what I SHOULD do".
I would proceed to tell him what to do. Sometimes he actually did what I asked. Things would be good for a while. Then, THEN I would notice I was still feeling unloved, and worthless.
I wanted my life partner to make me feel love, value, happiness. I was making another person responsible for my joy.
He never stood a chance.
I had to put down the magnifying glass that kept me focused on his actions and pick up the mirror and look at my own. How could my partner make me feel loved, when I didn't know how to love myself? How could my partner make me feel valued when I didn't value my own feelings? How could my partner make me happy, when I didn't know how to be happy with myself?
Making myself happy is an inside job.
Letting others make themself happy is, letting go and letting HP.