Rough Day and Realizations....
Today my baby had his 4month check up at the dr. AH was there with me and we discovered something that suggest my son might need surgery. So, I really felt like crying, however I didn't...and why because I knew that my AH would not be there to wrap his arms around me and tell me it is ok, I knew that he was to busy trying to blame this problem on something. His first comment was what if I hadn't told the dr what I noticed - would he have missed it. Then he asked me how we could have prevented it. I tried to explain the whole thing to him 10 times - none of which he really listened to. Even with this is was like talking to a wall. He came to the house and hung out with the kids a while then left begrudgingly - and wrote obviously I overstayed my welcome blah...blah...blah. My response, which was true was that my mood had nothing to do with him..I was worried about my baby. TO which he responded...and I wasn't? And I sent back that I never said that I was just telling him how I feel.....whatever. I realize he is having feelings about this thing with our son too, but I feel like I have noone to turn to...no arms to cry in....I guess that is an exact sign of how bad our relationship had gotten and perhaps always was. Please pray for my son, I find out tomorrow what is going to happen.