WOW thanks so much guys, I have been working on myself and my kids on themselves...daily, hour by hour, minute by minute...We are still struggling, but, its getting easier. He comes around, drunk, and I hate that...so I call the police everytime. I will never put up with being blamed for his addiction again. There will always be an excuse, and he will always push blame on my shortcomings, nevermind all of the years I have believed that he can change, and being a shoulder for him to cry on. I do still love him so very much, even through everything...but, I cannot watch him kill himself anymore. This last month has been the worst time of our 19 year relationship, 15 married. And it is the crack, not just the alcohol,he cannot do one without the other anymore. I have never seen such a sad sick person before. It is unbelievable that he still has a job. and he drives a semi for a living. I know this will not last either,it is just a matter of time before that is gone. We have been to a couple of Alanon/Alateen meetings and are trying to find a fit for us, and we are seeing a counselor, with the treatment center where he got help a year ago, wonderful people that truly care. It will be a long time to gain trust,if he ever gets sober again, but right now he is out of his mind, literally, and he is getting scary. Thats why I don't want him around. Being on here helps so much. Thanks again everyone, talking about it sure helps, and thanks for listening....We will be just fine...:0)
