I feel for you BadChoices, I really do. Falling in love is amazing. I remember being on that cloud. You are smarter than I am, I did not know he was an alcoholic until I started spending the night at his house. I thought I'd never been closer to another human being. We talked about absolutely everything.
I couldn't understand why when we shared a bottle of wine over dinner at a restaurant or at my house, he was fine. But somehow it made him drunker at his house. I realized...much later...after I moved in, that it was his hidden stash of vodka that he dipped into when I wasn't looking that was the difference.
Before I almost lost my own sanity, I learned that it is completely impossible to have a close intimate relationship with an active alcoholic. No matter how much you love, or support, or think you are helping. You will lose.
FWIW I left, got kicked out for getting in between him and the vodka, but I am happy, got my sanity, and he is seriously working his program of long-term sobriety.
Don't give up on this site, read everything you can, learn as much as you can. Our stories are all the same. And try Al-Anon; whether you stay with him or not, you will be healthier for it. That's always a good thing.