Originally Posted by
Still Waters 
Because not all of us fit the codependent mold, some of us didn't grow up in alcoholic or addict families, and some of us had perfectly fine and sober spouses until the ugly beast of alcoholism reared its head.
But, like all humans we may have made idiotic decisions, or held beliefs that were pretty stupid now seen in hindsight.
That's why.
Well, even though I do fit the "codependent mold," as you put it, I meet people every day who come from non-addict/alcoholic families that I would consider codependent. In fact, I believe that society as a whole (at least in the US), actually espouses and encourages codependent behavior and beliefs. Just watch any romantic comedy and you will see what I mean. My personal opinion, since finding recovery, is that there are probably more codepedents than not in today's society. (Again, I am only familiar with the US.) I don't consider them idiotic or stupid, but more a case of not knowing any better, or maybe being a tad closed-minded.
Again, this is just MHO, and I realize most will probably disagree. FWIW, I don't think labeling myself as codepedent carries any shame or is anything to be afraid of. Quite the opposite. It was a relief to me to have something to call my dysfunction and unhappiness, and a bigger relief to find out I had the ability to change it. I wasn't stupid or idiotic, I just learned some things along the way that were unhealthy and/or self-destructive. Now I am learning new things that enhance my life and serenity.
L