I have been to Al-Anon meetings for the past 8 months now and until now I finally realized I have not been working the steps. I got through step one then stopped. I took me 8 months to see that I needed to ask for help with the steps. I am still holding on to my pride a little. With the help of a friend on this board I finally find my higher power and it is what i understand for right now. Finally I understand my higher power I though it would never come. Now i have to believe my HP can restore me to sanity that is the second part of step two. I am working on it right now. Til this month I did not realize that I was just find with being with people that understand where I am coming from and that was okay with me but now I know it is more important to start working the steps now. I am not happy with myself and if I want to be happier I need to work the steps better. It is hard for me to talk in my group when they are on step 7 and i am still on 2. That is hard for me. But not to beat myself up maybe my HP gave me these months to open up and to come out of my shell. To actually talk infront of a group of people and that does not come easy for me. I know my HP is looking out for me I have to believe HE can restore me to sanity. Stupid question to ask but what is sanity. Still I little confused on the restore me to sanity part. Can anyone give me any light on this.
Love,
Shana, 18
