Anybody out there
I took my last four 10 mg hydrocodone this morning at nine. I'm already feeling like crap. My children are watching Nickelodeon in the room next to me, and noone knows....and I can't tell anyone because I know everyone in this freaking town. I'm ready to be done. I'm ready to quit spending money I don't have. I'm ready to not let this run my life. I'm ready to start running again. I feel like crying. I'm scared. I'm scared of not sleeping tomorrow night. I'm scared of having to go to work tomorrow with my legs and back hurting. I'm scared of yelling at my children because I'm angry and I can't control it tomorrow, and the next day. I've though about driving to my mother's house, and digging through her cabinets and seeing if I can find something....but I'm not going to....because I'm done...and it makes me sick that I'm even considering it. I'm scared of tomorrow, and Wednesday. I don't know when the feeling will start to get better, so I don't even have a day to look forward to....I just have pain and sleeplessness to look forward to. I don't know where else to turn. Is anyone up...anyone out there?