I did it again....at some level I enjoy the chaos or the drama. XAH emails me he never wants to hear from me again, threw away the cats dishes and gave the cat to a neighbor, and I ruined his kids lives......(hum)........he got a dui, went to jail, lost his job, walked out of two treatment centers, and is now losing his job and it is my fault......(hum)......let go or be dragged......no contact.......I still need to vent.......I am still hurt and angry even after being divorced 3 yrs. He is going crazy....he has a f---ed up brain.I need to pray for me in the situation. His kids loved me....and they have nothing to do with him.......hum........I'm a drama queen.......I need to stop though.....he can be dangerous.......