FreeingMyself... all the stages of the breakdown of my marriage... I experienced the same quacking from my now ex. The blame game got so bad that I actually kept a journal of the "exact" words he said and what I said... just as soon as anything was said.... just so I could keep my head on straight.
Fastforward to current day... been divorced since February this year. I've started a new journal with a new outlook on life. If I stop to give any reflection to the past...I realize now more than ever... life is too short to waste one precious moment on anything that remotely resembles chaos.
Alcoholism and addiction is pure chaos.
Ditto Freedom... He's not going to change!
Keep the faith.... one step at a time.