If my XABF had said those things about another woman I probably would have shoved him out the door, bags in hand, the moment it came up. Infidelity is at the top of my dealbreaker list. In hindsight, I do wish I had seen his addiction to alcohol the way we as loved ones can be addicted to them. It was a relationship I competed with, paid for, cried over, and lost my home over. My needs didn't get met but the booze had a great roll around with my EX.
I am so glad to hear that you have a plan in the works to extricate yourself from this relationship. It's not what you'd hoped for in a love with this man, and for that I am sorry. Leave him to his other woman and move on. Your heart with heal.
Best to you!
Alice