I wish you all that you need to cope with your problem, and oh how I saw my ex asleep in his chair, drink still in hand... as I read your post. I never told my kids what it was really like so they freaked out when I walked after 27 years.....soon found out for themselves and still can't understand how I kept quiet and left them in the dark.
Middle daughter's answer to me telling them, "you loved him so much, I didn't want to upset you and wreck that", "we still loved him, even when we felt like strangling him".
Then my girls were in their 20's when this happened, so what the result would be with younger kids, I don't know.
God bless