Hi Cali,
Hope today is a better day for you. After reading your last post, I had to say that my ABF said the same thing to me, "This is who I am, I am going to drink, and if you don't like it you can leave, why are you still here?" So I left. All along he told himself all the lies, that he was not like other alcoholics...he had a great life...I was his only problem because I had a problem with his drinking.
But when he woke up in an empty house, his life did not feel so great anymore. It became harder to lie, I guess. Anyway, he got sober...been sober almost 6 months, and working really hard on his recovery. He wants his old life back. But the thing is, once I got over the gut wrenching pain, I found out I liked living alone. So calm and peaceful after all the chaos. I would have lost my mind if I hadn't left. Al anon and SR have shown me a better way to live. My happiness is no longer dependent on his sobriety. I am free, no matter what, and it feels really good.
Good luck, keep reaching out for help, there is lot of it here.
You know, people who live with alcoholics can get just as insane as they are. They say, "insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result." All the talking and pleading in the world will not change an alcoholic. They have to want to stop all by themselves.
Hang in there; you will be fine.