This thread is reminding me how my xabf used to say "if I lived with you, things would be different."
8 or so months ago, when I accompanied him to see his therapist, even the therapist said, "he needs to be living with you-that's a much healthier environment" (than with his roommates, who all smoked pot and drank too much).
He never OFFICIALLY moved in with me - thank goodness. But we spent most of our time at my place.
Well, at the point he was sliding back into bar behavior again, he said he was BORED staying with me. He got tired of sitting around on my couch not doing anything.
Oh, but I would suggest other things besides going to the bar. Did he ever wanna do those things?
NO.
Yeah, typical catch-22. Don't EVER EVER EVER get yourself in the position of having to "save" anyone! Except yourself.
Originally Posted by
seekingcalm 
In the short time I have been visiting SR, I never cease to be amazed at how many of our stories are the same.
There is so much wisdom and experience here. When I read the word "savior", Floggo, it could have been me writing. I was set up as my ex AB's savior. "When we are together all the time, I won't drink...I will feel better...I will be more positive...Blah Blah Blah." After months of living together with him attending AA, but sneaking his drinking, and lying about it, it changed to "If only I wasn't there mistrusting him, he wouldn't drink".
With an alcoholic, you can go from savior to enemy in a heartbeat. You are smart to come here; Al Anon is also very helpful. Focus on you and your daughter, and believe me, if your gut tells you this situation is not right for you and your child, listen.