Oops! I just made myself 20 years older--LOL--but the message is the same. I'm finally giving up on "helping" my 57 year old AH.
I found for myself, and like you, having had others in my life that have succumbed to alcoholism, the sadness of seeing others slip away somehow strengthens your resolve to "fix it" even though you can't. And it just doesn't work that way, sad to say.