Hello there MusicIsLove, and welcome to SoberRecovery
I am sorry you are going thru so much pain. Addiction does that to people, it turns them into hurtful people and it ruins relationships. That's what it did to my marriage.
Originally Posted by
MusicIslove82 
.... I don't know how to handle all of this..... .
Oh goodness nobody does. That's why there's places like this, and therapists, and meetins of self-help groups, and tons of books in the self-help section of the bookstores. Take a little time to read thru the "sticky" posts at the top of this forum, there's a lot of wonderful information there. Also check out meetings of al-anon, they're the experts at helping us deal with loving someone who is addicted to alcohol. You can find them in your local phone book or here
How to find a meeting in the US/Canada/Puerto Rico
Originally Posted by
MusicIslove82 .... I'm sorry if I don't make much sense,it's hard to write and cry at the same time..... .
No worries. We've all done plenty of crying. In real life meetings of al-anon they even have boxes of tissue, so don't worry, we have all felt much the same way.
Welcome again, I'm glad you decided to join us. You'll find a lot of kind and wise people here who will show you how they survived the insanity of a loved one's addiction.
Mike