Almay,
So many times I feel like I can't do this all anymore either.. but then I think "What's the alternative?" I can go drink and in a day, a week, a month, etc.. I will be RIGHT BACK HERE..having to start all over. That is unless I want to just completely give up and live my life in the bottle. It is hard for me every single day - it is painful and overwhelming. But, at least for me, drinking had also become painful and overwhelming. At least through this pain of struggling with reaching sobriety I am gaining some self-respect and a small sense of hope. Either way it's going to be painful right now - continuing your quest for becoming sober is the only choice that can actually bring you to a place where things have a chance of getting better. You already know where the other choice continues to bring you. The physical stuff will improve - if you were drinking for years it's going to take a while to start seeing it. Your body has been abused for a long time - it will need time to recover. I know I keep expecting to look in the mirror and see drastic changes, but it's not going to happen overnight.