Hello...I'm new here.
I have a long story...I'll spare you that for now....I started dating a man who I knew drank too much and had a pretty bad history.....So, I decided it would be ok to see him if he wasn't drinking while we're together. I have my own history, but have made it a point to NEVER date an active addict/alcoholic...So this came totally out of left field for me.
So for the first couple months this worked out ok, we had a lot of fun and got along pretty well....LOTS OF LAUGHTER! ....Here we are three months later and since he lives about 45 mins from me, I used to go there when I had my two days off and spend it with him....Of course this didn't last because he is now (in my sick mind) purposely drinking the day right before I'm supposed to go down there.
It's obvious that my self worth cannot be too great to get involved with him in the first place....But now I'm a mess. All I can think is, why doesn't he just say he doesn't want to see me instead of going to meetings all week and doing the right thing and then purposely drinking because he knows I won't go there if he is. I would NEVER go anywhere uninvited, so of course he is the one asking me to come down to see him and then it's like a punch in the gut when he gets smashed right before I'm supposed to see him. It's really hurtful...I cannot believe I let myself get here.
Is this his way of just saying I don't want to see you even though I ask you to come here????????