I am skeeeered of upsetting the happy niceness we have. (by having 'the talk')
Anyone have any words of wisdom?
I think I have overdone myself with reading, posting and thinking today. (No work, no kids, no school, nothing that had to be done.. so I spent a lot of time here and pretty much did not a whole lot else but clean my house)
I know I need to take a little step back and just breathe a little. The world is not ending. The sky is not falling.
Ive kind of worked myself into a frenzy of questioning everything.
Like-- me and BF are so
nice to each other. Is THAT some alcoholic facade?
Have I romanticized everything?
We have pleasantness and peacefullness in our togetherness all the time.
I am afraid to make him feel self conscious.
I am afraid to make him feel bad.
I am afraid to make him afraid that I might leave.
I am afraid to put him on the spot.
YES, I know what co-dependence is. and no his feelings are not more important than mine or my kids.
But dang, I feel vulnerable saying and admitting that I have anxiety thinking about even starting a discussion about drinking.
** FTR, I do not feel afraid to talk about other problems with him.
it's always been dealt with so nicely. This one issue gives me high high anxiety though.
I feel like I'll be telling him something that is
really really wrong with him.
Why cant he be a jerk to me so I dont feel like I will be putting a sweet sweet person on the spot.