Hi, incognito, and welcome to SR.
Originally Posted by
incognito70 
Im left wondering to myself, w..t...f??? this guy treats me like Im golden. He is wise (minus the alcohol consumption), responsible, talks to me about all of lifes responsibilities and he's a do-er/ go getter. Besides drinking beer, he takes good care of himself, his house, even on weekends he's up by 6-7am. He's fixing things around the house, mowing, taking care of the yard, planning what we'll grill or cook... In all my 39 years, I do not know a better man than him. and it's not that Im use to trashy men. He's motivated. He's sweet, considerate..
This is a really good description of what I
thought about my STBXAH when we first started living together. Well, except the take care of his house part - STBXAH's own place always kind of reminded me of a college dorm room (some times it looked decent, others fairly messy)
.... Looking back to those times, he always had a beer in hand or nearby.
Originally Posted by
incognito70 One thing I wonder is... I feel pretty confident that he has very good control of himself and would be a good candidate for choosing to not drink.
Also what I thought about my STBXAH's drinking when I realized he might have problem. And in my case, a serious case of rose-colored glasses. Problem is that, like Hello-Kitty pointed out, alcoholism is a progressive disease. It gets worse. My STBXAH became some one else as the alcoholism progressed and he can't stop on his own. Each alcoholic's progression is different...
Originally Posted by
incognito70 now that he does not live with an alcoholic and that I am not an alcoholic like his last GF and that he has his own home and totally different lifestyle/ environment now... NOW would be a good time to make the change.
It does sound like a good time for a change. However, 'good time to change' for those affected by the alcoholic's drinking and 'good time' for an alcoholic can have vastly different descriptions. Definitely true in my situation.
IMO, it's probably good that he's approached you about quitting. You were right that it's up to him - only he can work his recovery. It sounds to me like he knows you're aware there's a problem and wants to talk about it. Relationships require open communication. Arm yourself with information about alcoholism, its affects on those around the alcoholic, and recovery, so that when he is ready to talk, you are too. (Al-Anon, reading and posting here at SR, there are great books available - there are several lists in the stickies...)
Best wishes.