My qualifier is my daughter and my anger shifted one day in therapy. I was telling my therapist how angry I was about something, and then he shocked me when he said "and you're more angry with yourself for allowing it."
Only you can decide if this applies to your situation, but it sure was the truth for me. I ended up laughing out loud on the drive home when I thought about him busting my chops. Reminded me of that saying "when you point a finger at someone, three fingers point back at you."