Originally Posted by
Callie 
I know because I have "6 monthed" myself to the nth degree. Nothing changes if nothing changes, huh? My problem has been that my husband has always done just barely enough to keep me hanging in there...never to the point where things are good - just to where they aren't "as bad".
I too have 6 monthed myself to death. I 6 monthed myself for years. Mine too threw me enough crumbs to leave me hanging for years. (prior to the last two years - I should say). He worked, did little around the house, started things ~ didn't finish them. Along the way I lowered my standards. If it's 6 months and you MEAN 6 months, it's a great plan, though I'd say is still too long. I'd be leery of the 6 months ending around a holiday though.
I have thought about this too but being that it's December 31st, I figure January would be a great way to clean house. I'm not that into the holidays so I will have no problem telling him to leave. Though, if he keeps up what he's doing it will be a lot sooner then December.
Last night he came to me with tears in his eyes and told me that he loved me and that i was his heart. I told him that I loved him too but that I meant what I said about the suboxone, the meetings, the sleeping half the day and him needing to get a better job. He immeditely got on the defensive and accused me of being a controling manipulative person. He then told me that he was going to be gung ho about meetings and that he would prove me wrong. I just sighed and told him that actions speak louder then words.
Today he was still in bed asleep at 11:30 when I left for work. Guess, today is not the day he is going to get gung ho about his recovery. Oh he will go to a meeting tonight, the one he goes to occasionaly that he complains about incessently. He will go just to fool himself but not me.
The six months ulitimatium is more for me then him. I know he is not going to change. But in my heart I have to know that I gave him every chance to change.
Why do they tell us they love us the way he told me last night? In their own way do they love us or is it just said out of fear, manipulation and emotional blackmail?