Good Morning :)
I would love to join you all if you have an open spot! :)
I've been around SR for a few years and most active during the summer months, which are the toughest for me when it comes to consuming/abstaining from alcohol. I am a member of the July 2008 and August 2009 groups :)
I am married to a great guy and we have two young boys, which I home school. My problems with alcohol began after I became a stay-at-home mom, but looking back, I believe I was always in the "danger zone", but just didn't know it. At my worst, I would drink alcohol 4-5 evenings per week, consuming a bottle of wine or a 6-pack each night. I was able to break out of that cycle last fall and only drink on occassion. Things were going quite well and then as the warmer months (spring) approached and we got busier, I could feel my red flags going up and I started getting some pretty clear messages (I am Christian and they were from God) that I needed abstain COMPLETELY from drinking alcohol. The last time I felt God reaching out to me, I did not listen and this time I wasn't going to make THAT mistake again. I won't go into detail because I know not everyone here is of the same faith/belief. If you'd like for me to share my story, PM me :)
I had (and still have) every intention of listening this time, but I gave into temptation while on vacation this past week and am feeling the consequences of my actions. Things have not spun out of control or anything, but I can see that this is not going to be an easy battle. Summertime is a very social time for us and while it is easy for me to abstain/control things in the fall/winter, it is NOT in the summer. We are constantly surrounded by situations with alcoholic rituals and I am easily tempted in those situations. Yesterday we took my husband out for dinner and I ordered drinks. That was my sign that I had so easily forgotten the very clear messages I have been receiving. This is my pattern and I recognize it...
Anyway...I hope my post doesn't sound too cryptic and that it makes sense. I am on Day 1 and counting. Fortunately, I don't have to break out of any daily drinking routines this time and have no withdrawal to experience. It's just the ongoing temptations I will experience through the summer months. My goal is complete abstinence in all situations. I hope we can support one another on this path! It's definitely NOT easy...but all it takes is saying, "NO!" to that first drink...
Have a great day everyone :)