Old 06-15-2010, 09:56 PM
  # 30 (permalink)  
kelsh
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Omak WA
Posts: 1,049
Thumbs up My drinking pattern was all over the place....

depending on what was going on in my life. I grew up with my alcoholic grandmother living with us & swore I would never be like her...I ended up every bit like her though.

I didn't start drinking until I got married at 20 years old & then it was a big deal to share a six pack with my husband on Friday nights. As most of you know as time goes by the amount I drank increased because I liked how it made me feel.

Then the difficult times would come along & my drinking would increase. This continued on until it started affecting my marriage so I moved out so I could drink as much as I wanted to. I drank most every evening & all weekend.

The trauma's in my life were like a key to another level of drinking to block everything out of my mind but it didn't work. When I worked I didn't drink as often or as much & when pregnant I didn't drink at all but because I couldn't keep anything down...even water in the first months.

Eventually I crossed that invisible line you hear people talk about where the alcohol had me & I couldn't function without it at a certain time of day when working...would start drinking as soon as I got home until I went to bed. I did this for four years until I was so sick of everything I knew if I didn't get help I would die soon...I was a walking example of an alcoholic with a very red face & under weight.

I asked for help for my alcoholism & Clinical Depression at the same time & had two counselors...one for the alcoholism & one for the depression. That was 21 years ago & I am still sober & still see my doctor for my depression.

I stopped soon enough that my body wasn't damaged but still have the trauma to deal with now & again but now know what to do to help myself.

I wanted to be sober more than anything else in my life & I worked the AA Program & went to meetings & improved my job skills so ended up at retirement with a good feeling about what I had accomplished.

kelsh
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