lost hopes
I'm new here. Not real sure how this works yet so if I post at the wrong places or times - sorry - I've been reading a lot of messages - thinking and taking in how many of us there are - I finally realized that my struggle at this moment is having to accept that what I thought and hoped and prayed recovery would be for my son is not going to be - he had a rough journey to what I was calling recovery and I thought surely that would be it - I even had a few months of feeling what it might be like for the whole nightmare to be behind us and then he relapsed and it was like he fell off a cliff - so many things happened so quickly - and now he will very likely be spending time in prison - it's been two weeks since his arrest and my head is trying so hard to wrap itself around what happened and how fast it happened - my heart is trying to adjust to lost hopes - I am grateful that my son is alive and at this moment I know he is not using - he is such a sweet guy - i just don't want to accept that things may never really get any better -