Thank you for the nice welcoming responses.
You are right mamm... I know alcohol is toxic. Actually it is so toxic, it causes so many insecurities that if I have drunk too much the night before and have an argument with husband/kids, I always wonder if it was my fault (mood swinging) or if I really had a reason... It is just so hart to acknowledge a problem when everybody around (husband, friends, etc.) enjoy a drink and do not believe you have an alcohol problem. I know everybody says others suspect it, and in the past I am convinced they did, but not right now.
Thank you again.