SS.....I am love your follow up posts. You know that rehab is your best option at this point. Take it and use it because your life and others do depend on it.
As far as Ryan goes.....well that is simply age and booze talking. I was married (now that is real commitment) and owned a home and had many years of my life and all that we had created together - GONE when I got divorced. His family, our friends, and everything just poof!
Point of my saying that is......I felt like I couldn't live or breath without him and I had many reasons for feeling that way which were justifiable. Divorce is like death in a sense that we grieve. To make it all the worse, he filed for it when I was at my most vulnerable. I was a full time grad student and had not a pot to **** in without him to be direct.
Guess what? I made it on my own, met another wonderful person who is far more of a man then my ex ever could have been and I got sober!
The dude broke up with you on facebook. That isn't something you should continue drinking for. Once you have been off the sauce a while....your self-esteem will rebuild and you will look at this chapter in your young life and say wow.....I can't believe how great sobriety is and how alcohol made me think things were so bad that I was on the edge over a jerk who dumped me on facebook.
You sooooo deserve better and the fact you get support for each of your posts/threads speaks volumes over how much all of us care about you.
I am so rallying the troops over here for ya girl. You are doing the right thing and I am so proud of you to take control of your life
Huggs.