(((Teke))) - so GOOD to see you!! BTW, I'm sorry I havent' called...started working at McDonald's, crazy hours and also working 2 other jobs.
Anyway, I think you are very justified in not letting your stepson live there. Yes, he may be depressed, but there are ways to deal with it. However, he needs to put forth the effort in doing that. My stepmom is chronically depresed and I used to do everything I could to bolster her self-esteem, bring her out of her depression and finally realized she wants to stay there. There's nothing I can do.
What I had to do was accept her for how she is. I have no choice but to live in the same house, but I severely limit contact with her when she is in "one of her moods". I've told her, a gazillion times, how much I love and care about her, but I don't know if it gets through. Once again, I had to accept that I've done the best I can.
You may have to do the same with your stepson. We can only do so much. If they don't want help, we can't force it.
I hate to see this happen...I know he has been part of your family since he was practically dropped in your lap and "given" to you.
Just know that you are doing the right thing, sweetie. You've done your job at raising him and it's time for him to find out what being an adult really means.
Love, hugs and prayers!
Amy