coffee
thanks for the reply
yes I am working on myself i had to start doing that along time ago due to my craziness over my husbands drug use. We have had therapy together and ya know I thought I was okay, there was alot of hurt and healing to get thru and we worked thru and past a lot of deep stuff.
now with my son smoking pot and my husband and I not in ageement over how to deal with it, the resentments i guess are resurfacing
I am trying to see it from his point of view but honestly If I held the line with him as firmly as he now expects me to hold it with my son we wouldnt have survived and would be divorced by now.
I guess I feel like my husband could be more supportive of me and how this feels for me as well as accept his part and maybe think back to how many times he wasnt here to help with the kids and how he chose to use rather than consider us. Yet hes upset that a 19 year old boy/man is chosing to smoke pot over the wishes of his parent............and his step fathers probation (due to a drug related crime he committed)
I guess to me it seems ----that he wanted my support, help and for me not to give up on him thru his addiction, and now my son is smoking pot
( WRONG ----100% wrong ANY DRUG USE EVER!!!! and I hate that he is doing it at all, it grips me with fear that he could progress to other things)
but husband says the only way to "make him stop" is dont do anything for him, no car no cell no computer no buying him anything and if he keeps smoking kick him out.
Not excuses here just trying to describe the situation..........son has a job, and goes to college is a decent kid in general and thinks pot is okay and says hes not "stupid" enough to do anything else, its his body as long as he doesnt ever bring it in or house or cars again "whats the big deal what I do?"
I wish I could make him NOT smoke pot, I can enforce my house rules but kicking him out if he smokes pot is that really the solution? That to me, would just put him out there with less supervision and more access to worse things...............oh I dont know what to do really I dont.
It looks like I have alot more work to do on me this is not fun. Life was suppose to only hold ONE drug abuser/addict and now when one is good I have another who could very well be headed the same way.
URRRRGGG