Hi Humblestudent. Did you tell on yourself before you picked up? I posted a thread about this recently.
Always share where you're at with other recovering alcoholics/addicts otherwise you will start believing your own lies!! This is where your alcoholism want's you; alone, resentfull and discontented!! I bet if you had of properly confided in others in recovery before you picked up then you wouldn't have picked up!! I know it's hard but next time when you start to feel your thinking going a bit wrong then let it all out!! SR is a great tool for that or at AA meetings or with a sponsor or counsellor or whoever.
Use this as the final experiment if you like. You know drinking ain't an option now, it doesn;t work anymore, so do everything possible to commit to sobriety. When you feel yourself slipping into old thought patterns then tell on yourself!! YOu can then work through it and address your thinking by working your recovery!!
Keep on Keeping on!! YOu were doing really well beofre you drank again so build on that sobriety that you had and take this as a positive learning experience!!
Peace xxx