Welcome Cyrus! It's great to have you here. Thank you for your service!
No one wants to be a walking pharmacy or a drunk - you are in good company here, mostly great people who got stuck in the insanity of addiction without even realizing what was going on. I found my way out by reading and being encouraged here. Not feeling alone lifts a huge burden from us. Many have found help in NA and AA. I don't presently attend meetings, but have friends who have found them lifesaving.
I hope you can get medical advice on stopping the drugs - it's never easy to do it ourselves, and can be dangerous. Please let us know how you're doing.